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| Painting by me!! |
Good Day
Today was very mellow. When I was waken by my aunt at 7:30am only to have just fell asleep at 5:30am, I felt light. My pulse, skin, head, and body all felt light. It is a feeling I get when I wake up and it scares me especially my pulse being light or non-existent scares me to not go back to sleep because i dont want my heart to stop and I die. So I wait until I fall asleep unknowingly only to be awaken at 10am and asked why I am so sleepy -_-... So when I finally give up trying to sleep and is sluggish and aware of my heartbeat because it felt kind of heavy and hard to take a deep breath. Eventually after getting dressed and refraining from cheking my pulse it got better andwe(my aunt and I) left her house to bring me back home, it was around 12:30pm. So we go to Costco to get some crossants for my grandmother and the household and then carry on our way down the road back to Maryland since she lived in Virginia. As time progressed I realized I still havent eaten and it was making me antsy and my heartrate was getting irregular so I started to check it but my aunt realized this and we started talking distracting myy from my minds thoughts of thinking I would die right in the car. yes scary thoughts. So eventually hunger got the best of me and I convinced her to stop and get something to eat because I was breathing a little heavier by this point. Once I ate I felt great and we eventually made it home. I was happy but my heartrate rose due to the fact I had to haul all our stuff to my apartment myself so it put me into kind of a relapse of checking my pulse but eventually it settled down when I sat down and relaxed and occupied my mind. So eventually I took a shower to calm myself down more and it helped!! so since 6pm I have been fine and have not checked my pulse and kept my mind and mouth busy with activities and food! Compared to yesterday where I checked my pulse all day until my neck became sore and hurt it was a good day!!
Okay Bye~~
